Had your heart broken? Don’t want to be hurt or duped again in love? People who triumphed over their previous bad relationships did at least these three things:
- They took time to understand their past relationships and childhood.
- They remained optimists about themselves and love.
- They knew they could lead happy lives without a love partner—but they kept their heart open to the possibility of finding love.
In my five years of research with thousands of women for my book, “Smart Relationships,” we all learned that, in addition to the three items above, the people who were successful in love were able to build trust in their judgment.
And how did they do that? They learned to read people and their own emotional, cognitive, and physiological reactions. Over time, they established love intuition.
Intuition is your ability to focusin seconds on what’s most important to observe in all areas of your surroundings, including inyou—and on what to ignore. Imagine if you could develop this mindfulness about you and your environment so you could quickly detect, interpret, select, and accept as true the most valuable information about the cues and clues that come from you, people, this earthly world or other!
Intuitive people are open people who accept that guidance can come from many sources. They know how to access more quickly and accurately all their powers.
I want you to have this ability, too! So, let’s start getting smart right now!
Building Your Love Intuition Quiz
1. Look at the picture at the beginning of this article. Could these two people be good for each other? Answer Yes or No.
Analysis:
These two people are holding hands—but lots of unhappy people hold hands. The clues are in their faces, necks, and shoulders. They are looking at each other. They are smiling. And he is smiling enough to make his eyes crinkle at the temples. It’s a real smile! And their necks and shoulders are turned ever so slightly toward each other. The answer: Yes—they are sending body signals that say they are happy together.
2. Look at the picture below. Are these two people in good love? Answer Yes or No.
Analysis:
Well, they are looking at each other. And his hand is reaching past the midpoint of the table and toward her. Hmm…But look at their fingers. All the visible fingers are in closed fists. And she is concealing her entire forearm and keeping it close to her body. Finally, the closed fist at his chin is also partially concealing his lips. Mouths and hands are important sources of cues and clues about how a person—or how you feel about your date. In poker games, these signs are “tells.” Be on the lookout in you and your date for lips and fingers. The answer: No. These two are too closed up for love.
3. Look at the picture below. Is this woman really happy to be with this person? Answer yes or no.
Analysis:
Well, her fists are closed. Hmm…But now they seem to be used for a good purpose: they are assisting her head, neck, and chin to lean toward her date—without hiding her mouth. Her smile is broad, open, and high enough to lift her eyes and her eyebrows. The answer: Yes! She really likes her date.
4. Look at the picture below. Who is the couple? How happy is this couple?
Analysis:
Well, no one really looks very happy at all on this “hang out with friends” night out. Let’s start clockwise around the table beginning with the women in a red dress, in front of a pink laptop. She is not happy. In fact, she doesn’t even want to be there! She is playing with her hair, a common “tell” for unhappiness, nervousness or insecurity. Her head is tilted down and her eyes are slightly bulging with disapproval. Be aware of you when you play with your hair. And watch to see if your date plays with his or her hair.
Now move on to the man next to her. His hands are entwined in front of his mouth! His eyes seem to stare without focusing.
Look at the woman with the long dark hair next to him. Her hand that is holding the glass is slightly tilted in the direction of the man with the entwined hands. The fingers of her other hand are looser, and her forearm is near his. Her eyes, however, are looking away from him. If they are a couple, they are not a happy one! It’s also likely that she has mixed feelings about being with him.
Move on to the man in the white shirt. Look at his face. He is almost smiling. He is not focusing his face on anyone. However, if you look closely, he is toasting with his wine glass the glass of the woman with the long brown hair, with her back toward you. He is trying to make a connection with this woman. In fact, the two of them are the only ones who are toasting their wine glasses. However, look at the way his forearm is folded over the crook in his elbow of the hand that is holding the wine glass. He seems to be bracing himself or holding back. The person between them has his or her fist partially covering the mouth. Answer: Most likely the two people toasting are a couple—or perhaps are trying to be. But this is, overall, an unhappy group where no one is “meshing.” What a terrible evening And they aren’t even engaged in looking together as a group at what might be on the computer.
The next time you are with your friends or dates, pay attention to your and your date’s hands and mouth, the space between people, smiles, and turns of the head, neck, and shoulder.
In part 2, you’ll have another chance to practice again to learn about the cues and clues that boost your love intuition.
Thank you for stopping by. I hope these tips help. My mission is to help you stay smart, brave, sweet and intuitive about love, life, and work. Want to be part of my next book about empowering your intuition about love, happiness, success, and other things? I would love to hear your story. Please go to my website, www.lovevictory.com. Click on the Contact tab in the upper right. Sign up for my free gift to you! Provide your contact information, and in the Message box, write the word ANGEL or the word INTUITION. I will send you the information! Thank you in advance! Your participation will help others!
Dr. LeslieBeth (LB) Wish is a nationally recognized Licensed Clinical Psychotherapist LCSW #7132 FL, honored for her pioneering work with women’s issues in love, life, work and family. The National Association of Social Workers has included her on their list of the Fifty who has Contributed to the Profession. She is the subject of biographical entry in many Marquis’Who’s Who publications. Her latest self-help, research-based books are Smart Relationships and The Love Adventures of Almost Smart Cookie, the cartoon companion book where you can follow a year of Cookie’s love missteps and learn about yours!
